How to Act Right

Scripture:  Romans 13:8-14

               It probably is not your imagination, or in the very least you are not alone in your perception.  Last year Pew Research released the results of a study that showed that almost 50% of American adults believe that people have gotten ruder since the pandemic.  Because it is a sensational headline many media outlets latched on to reporting on this study by calling it a rudeness epidemic.  These articles try to pull reasons out of the research for why there is a perception of an increased rudeness.  One of the reasons is related to technology, and the research showed that many see listening to videos on phones in public without headphones as a rude behavior.  Of course, a slim majority also saw always having headphones on in public as rude behavior as well.   Another reason offered up was that since the pandemic, people in general have experienced higher levels of stress, which decreases patience, and leads to rude behavior. 

               One of the things the study concluded is that a general shift in society and culture has been underway post-pandemic, and this shift contributes a lot to the perception of increased rudeness.  In some ways, this shift is not entirely bad.  For instance, in previous eras there was immense societal pressure in the form of guilt and shame to keep in line with what was considered polite.  Guilt and shame is not as powerful as a motivator today, and less guilt, less shame is probably an overall good thing.  However, it does seem that many people today are less likely to think about how their actions might impact the people around them, and that sort of carelessness for others is not such a good thing.   The end result of all this is that about half of us have a strong sense that a lot of people today just don’t know how to act right. 

               This is also nothing new.   For instance, after WWI there was a lot of commentary about the end of manners and increased rudeness as Victorian manners faded away in the post-war world.   We go all the way back to the third chapter of Genesis, the bible makes the point that people not knowing how to act right has been a problem since the very beginning.  It has always been a problem, and it was a problem when Paul wrote his epistles.  In a world that doesn’t know how to act right, this morning’s scripture gives us direction on how to live like no one else. 

               We have spent a lot of time in Romans this year.  In fact, this is the ninth time that our scripture reading on a Sunday morning (spoiler alert: next Sunday will be the tenth time).  Most of Paul’s letter to Romans is focused on these large theological points of grace, forgiveness, and salvation.  After completing his main points, Paul shifts gears for the last couple of chapters of Romans and focuses on how to act right.   He writes to the Christian community of Rome about how they should live as followers of Jesus.   Last week we looked at a scripture from Romans chapter 12, where in quick succession Paul gives 18 different directives.   By time we get to this morning’s scripture in chapter 13, Paul has slowed down a bit.  He is taking more time to elaborate, but the point is the same.  When it comes to living our daily life, followers of Jesus should live in a way that might be different than the culture around them.  In this morning’s scripture we see two specific ways to do that. 

We find the first way put forth in verse 9, where Paul quotes Jesus, who is quoting Leviticus:   “Love your neighbor as yourself.”   Jesus stated that this is one of the two great commandments, upon which all of the others and the prophets hang.   Paul says something similar.  He states several of the big commandments from the ten commandments and then states that all of these plus whatever other commands there may be summed up on love your neighbor as yourself.  I do not think we need to overcomplicate this.   John Lenon was right in 1967 when he sang, “All you need is love, love.  Love is all you need.” 

               Despite the simplicity of the command, we have an unfortunate tendency to try to add exceptions, exemptions, qualifiers, and justifications about who we do or do not have to love.   That is true now, and it was true in the first century when Paul wrote this scripture, so Paul tries to cut through the excuses not to love that we might offer up with a couple of points.   

               The first of these points is found in verse 8: “Let no doubt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another.”  This is an odd statement because it puts love in economic terms.  It is odd because economics is by definition transactional.  This creates an issue, because love by definition can not be transactional.   Love is not a commodity that can be bartered, exchanged, or sold.   So, what does it mean to have a continuing debt to love one another?  

               To answer this question, we must look back at Paul wrote elsewhere in Romans.  Because we do not owe a debt to each other.  The idea is not that because someone did us a good turn, we are now obligated to reciprocate because that would be transactional and that would not be love.   No we do not owe a debt to each other, we owe a debt to a much greater source.   As Paul wrote, in Romans chapter 5, “You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. . .God demonstrates his own love for us in this, while were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

  The price that God paid for us is a debt that we can never repay.  Thanks be to God, that we do not have to for salvation and eternal life is a free gift offered to all.   It is not something that we can earn, it is not something that we deserve, and it is not something that we can ever repay.    This is why in the third verse of Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing Robert Robinson wrote, “O to grace how great a debtor I’m constrained to be.” 

In Paul’s writing it is not that we owe each other a debt of love.  It is that God’s love for us made known through Jesus Christ, the love of God that saves us, and transforms us is a gift that we could never repay-but we can respond to.   Our response to the extravagant love of God is to pay it forward in how we love others.  This is idea that Paul is putting in the terms of a debt to love one another.   A different apostle, John, put it a little differently, in 1 John he wrote: “We love because, he first loved us.”  We have been shown such an amazing love by God, that we should seek to share that love with others, and even if we radically love every person we come into contact with the depth of our actions will still measure as mere drops in the vast ocean that is God’s love. 

As followers of Christ the most effective way that we can respond to the love of Christ that saves us is to pay it forward and pass it on.  It really should not be hard, but because we do tend to overcomplicate it Paul also gives us some direction on how to make it less complicated in verse 10 where he wrote, “Love does no harm to a neighbor.”   Doing no harm is the first step to loving action.  There is a prevalent modern-day example of how we end up causing harm under the guise of loving our neighbor.   There is a really good chance you have heard the saying “love the sinner, hate the sin.”   This phrase which is not anywhere in the bible, is common today and it causes harm.   The argument is that we should hate sin, and I do not disagree- but the sin we should hate is our own.  When people say love the sinner, hate the sin, they are nearly always talking about someone else’s sin. I can say from my study of Christian history, and from the observations made during my lifetime Christians are not very capable at making the distinction between sin and sinner.  If we devote any energy to hating anything about someone else, I am not sure how well we can love them at the same time.  

There is story after story of people who have been hurt by the church, and a lot of these stories start with this attitude.  Where good church people were judgmental, cruel, and rude.  Often this was done under the guise of supposedly loving the person but hating their sin.   But if someone tells us our words and actions have caused them harm, we do not get to tell them that they are wrong.  Friends, Love the sinner, hate the sin, should not be our motto.   Let’s drop the last five words or so and just focus on love.  

The second major point that Paul offers up is one of integrity and authenticity, which we find expressed in verse “Let us behave decently as in the daytime.”  Paul is utilizing a motif that was common in first century moralistic writings, and it is also one present in the gospel of John.   Day and night language was used to distinguish between good and evil behavior.   As my grandfather often said, “Nothing good happen after midnight.” 

 There is a lot of truth to this both literally and metaphorically.  Often the worst of human behavior happens in secret and darkness away from the eyes of others. The challenge this scripture puts forth is that we put aside the deeds of darkness and instead focus on living like Christ.  There is no off season for this, it is not like we clothe ourselves in Christ on Sunday morning but then shed those clothes the rest of the week.   Integrity is doing the right thing even when no one is watching.   Authenticity is being the same person at all times.   That is what this scripture is pushing us towards.  

Unfortunately, integrity and authenticity is sometimes lacking in people who claim to follow Jesus.  It seems weekly we find a news story of a pastor or church leader who is caught up in a scandal of some sort of misdeed.   Almost always in these cases it is revealed that the person caught and being held accountable was living a double life.   They presented themselves publicly and then in darkness and secret lived another.   Catholic writer Brennan Manning once pointed out, “The single greatest cause of atheism in the world today are Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips but then walk out the door and deny him by their lifestyle.  That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.”   

 Friends, he wrote that 36 years ago so it is not like this is a new problem, but it is one that is magnified in our modern context.  With social media, constant access through cell phones, and everything being recorded on the Internet it is a lot easier to see when Christians behave badly.   As Christians we should be seeking to be like Christ.  When we greet one another on Sunday morning, then people should see Christ. On Monday morning and Thursday afternoon people should still see Christ.   When the ref makes a bad call then in our response people should still see Christ.  When we are stuck in traffic behind someone who does not use their turn signal, then people should still be able to see Christ in us.  When we post online and interact on social media our words should reflect Christ.   An unbelieving world finds it unbelievable when our faith does not influence our actions, and the only way to correct that is we have to act right.   We seek to act like Christ and love like Christ, even when no one else is watching.   

It may be true.  People may be ruder today, and it may be that a lot of people do not know how to act right.   But may we not be among them, because this morning’s scripture and the whole of scripture tells us how to act right.  We love.  We love our neighbors as ourselves.  No exceptions, no qualifications.  All means all.   We love our neighbors and to the best of our ability we live likes of authenticity and integrity where we seek to be as Christ like as possible even when no one is looking.   May we love and may we show unbelieving world what it means for a Christian to act right.